im not sure when it happens in life, but somewhere between being a wild and carefree child & adulthood, we acquire the worst emotional attribute this world has to offer.
F E A R.
I'm not talking fear of spiders or ghosts or going upside on a roller coaster. I'm talking about the invisible fears that tug on our heartstrings on gloomy mornings. the fear of being alone forever, not getting into heaven, or never looking like the girl on the cover of shape magazine. the silent fear of wanting something so badly but being too afraid to get after it; or being fearful of your own desire to let something you have, go. these are big, bad, ugly fears, deeply rooted into our minds garden like a weed with sharp thorns & they grow wildly as they please.
As the seasons of life change, my fears do too. old fears, have now faded away with the addition of a husband & a daughter. while some still loom in the back of my mind when that season of life comes around again, but its this whole new set of fears that are making me crazy lately.
my fears for her.
my perfect little being.
we live in a scary world people. i am absolutely positive that this is not new news to you. but completely aside from the school shootings and textersanddrivers, i almost find myself more fearful for her heart. she is growing up in a world where the word basic is thrown around freely, like it doesn't really mean "not good enough." where 8 year olds are wearing wedges and winged eyeliner to elementary school, where people of all ages get to hide behind the keys of a keyboard and tell you what they really think; and where love and sex are so disregarded and thrown into the category of something that you just, do.
i wish that there was a cure all, i wish that i could shield her from the less beautiful situations in this world. keep her in a 5point safety harness carseat until she's 30, homeschool her, choose her friends for her etc. but at some point i have to let her LIVE, just as God created us to do! so instead of locking her up in a tall, tall tower and never letting her meet a boy (or mean girls) like, ever.... i will instead do my very best to raise her to be strong, steady, kind & most of all rooted deeply in the Father. for the burning questions I cannot answer, I will send her to scripture and there she will find self-worth, purpose & learn the true definition of love and all of the wonderful weight it carries.
it doesn't help her for me to be fearful, fear breeds more fear & it isn't a fruit we were designed to bear. i can't say that i won't ever worry or try to micromanage her life because i can spot a bad idea from a mile away; but like the seasons in my own life sweep away fears, as she grows into a smart and witty little girl and then into a beautiful, young woman making wise decisions on her own, they will do the same with my fears for her.
we live in a scary world people. i am absolutely positive that this is not new news to you. but completely aside from the school shootings and textersanddrivers, i almost find myself more fearful for her heart. she is growing up in a world where the word basic is thrown around freely, like it doesn't really mean "not good enough." where 8 year olds are wearing wedges and winged eyeliner to elementary school, where people of all ages get to hide behind the keys of a keyboard and tell you what they really think; and where love and sex are so disregarded and thrown into the category of something that you just, do.
i wish that there was a cure all, i wish that i could shield her from the less beautiful situations in this world. keep her in a 5point safety harness carseat until she's 30, homeschool her, choose her friends for her etc. but at some point i have to let her LIVE, just as God created us to do! so instead of locking her up in a tall, tall tower and never letting her meet a boy (or mean girls) like, ever.... i will instead do my very best to raise her to be strong, steady, kind & most of all rooted deeply in the Father. for the burning questions I cannot answer, I will send her to scripture and there she will find self-worth, purpose & learn the true definition of love and all of the wonderful weight it carries.
it doesn't help her for me to be fearful, fear breeds more fear & it isn't a fruit we were designed to bear. i can't say that i won't ever worry or try to micromanage her life because i can spot a bad idea from a mile away; but like the seasons in my own life sweep away fears, as she grows into a smart and witty little girl and then into a beautiful, young woman making wise decisions on her own, they will do the same with my fears for her.
for God does not give us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, love & a sound mind.
2 timothy 1:7
2 timothy 1:7
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